This one's more of a philisophical debate.

Dearest friends and readers, today I offer you not so much a joke as a question:

If Helen Keller (that's me) were psychic, would she (I) call it a fourth sense?

You see, I was both blind and deaf. And though I learned to speak, read and talk, one would think that the absence of sensory input would denote a lack of sense. So while touch, feel and smell were all abilities of mine, I was lacking the other two. Therefore, when most people refer to psychic abilities (or ESP) as a SIXTH sense, for me it might possibly be a fourth. What do you think?

A return most triumphant!

Sorry for the delay loyal readers. It has taken me some time to figure out the ways of this internets thing. I mean, imagine yourself trying to figure out how to use a visual medium without the aid of sight. By the hammer of Thor it is tres difficult! But, as with all things in life, I have persevered and triumphed. In order to help me tell my hilarious jokes, I have enlisted the help of my good friend Charles to deliver all of the punchlines. Just click on the link and you will hear what I would say if I could say things. Thanks for coming!

Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Click to hear.

Q: No seriously why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Click to hear.

I wish I could click to hear...

Welcome to Helen Keller's Funny Joke Page

I'm so glad you made it! For the last few decades I've been...well...I mean...well I guess the best way to describe it is...DEAD.

Don't sit there all mouth agape pretending you're shocked. There must have been news articles about it. Right? You probably read them. I would have, except for the whole buried six-feet under thing. Oh, and being blind while convention has most news dailies being print in text for the 99.3% of people who aren't blind.

Anyways, during my respite I haven't just been giving the ol' ojos a rest - not that they needed them with me being blind and all. I've been listening to the pounding on the wooden floor of my soul and it told me via the language that Louis Braille invented that I should be writing, or at least repeating, funny jokes.

So I started this thing called a "blog," which I guess is the new term for propoganda-type pamphlets. I hope you sincerely enjoy what you hear on this page (you'll have to sign me how it sounds).

Mushmouth at you soon!